Quotes by Funny Quote

Sometimes we can focus so much on nothing that we make it a big something of nothing.

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I’m the type of person that will burst out laughing in dead silence over something that happened days ago…

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Sleep is such a luxury, which I can’t afford.

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I exercised once, but found out I was allergic to it! My skin flushed and my heart raced. I got sweaty and short of breath. Very dangerous!

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This too shall pass. It might pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass.

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I wish there was a way to donate fat, like you can donate blood.

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Me? Mature??! Ha! I still laugh when the ketchup bottle “farts”!

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A best friend is someone who loves you when you forget to love yourself.

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What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.

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My Diet Plan: Make all my friends cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look!

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Stressed is dessert spelled backwards.

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I love you from my head tomatoes.

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Stress does not go with my outfit.

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I could lay next to you forever. Or until we decide to go eat.

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I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.

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The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.

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I always try to go the extra mile at work, but my boss always finds me and brings me back.

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Stressed is dessert spelled backwards.

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I love you. You annoy me more than I ever thought possible. But I want to spend every irritating minute with you.

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Some days, the best thing about the job is that the chair spins.

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I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin me.

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Mondays are the start of the work week which offer new beginnings 52 times a year.

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The best part about going to work is coming back home at the end of the day.

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Well, don’t expect us to be too impressed. We just saw Finnick Odair in his underwear.

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Dear sleep, I’m sorry I hated you as a young kid. Right now I love you very much and cherish every moment with you.

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By working faithfully 8 hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work 12 hours a day.

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